First
by Akiirah
Summary: AU: He was her first boyfriend, her first love. And yet, he was gone - gone to a tragedy that could only make her feel even more helpless than ever before. Three years later, Maka Albarn attends University with little expectations, and still stuck on her deceased ex-fiance who has never left her mind. But can a white-haired 'cool-guy' help her learn to move on? Soul x Maka
1. Chapter 1: First Love

**Summary: **He was her first boyfriend, childhood friends who had taken the next step after years of wondering. He was her first kiss, a dark day made brighter by one simple gesture of love. He was her first time, a painful yet pleasurable moment she was sure she would remember for the rest of her life. He was her first fiancé, the first person who had ever truly wanted to be with someone like her... and then he died two hours later on their graduating night, just like that. Three years later and now in University, Maka struggles with the thought of moving on - but a motorcycle riding "cool guy" may just be able to help her learn what it takes to do just that.

**Rating: **T

**Genre: **Romance, Hurt/Comfort

**Pairing: **Soul x Maka

**Disclaimer: **I do not own Soul Eater or have any real connections to it, this is simply a fan writing out her ideas and fantasies of the numerous characters that belong to TV Tokyo and Atsushi Ōkubo.

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**First**

Chapter One: _First Love_

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She had concluded that first days were a lot scarier than she had thought they would be. Standing quietly in the Kindergarten Classroom, she buried her nose further into her book - already reading despite her young age. She supposed after being read to every night by her Papa had eventually gotten boring, and she had began to want to try it herself.

Her classmates falling into chaos around her, she did her best to ignore them - a vein no doubt popping out of the side of her head as she slammed her book down on the short table, her pigtails perked up slightly. "Maka Chop!" She cried, slamming her book down on the closest trouble maker - a blue haired boy was climbing on the furniture and rough housing with anyone who dared to challenge him. "O-oi! You dare to challenge the great Black*Star!?" He cried, gesturing towards himself with a thumb as the petite girl glared at him with her emerald eyes. "What makes you so great!?" she said angrily, waiting for another reason to smack him with her book again. "Because..! Because I'm Black*Star, the one who will surpass the Gods!" He faltered for a second, before cockily gesturing towards himself - the girl finally having a reason to hit him again.

The next day, the pig-tailed girl was no match for her blue haired companion, the two wrestling it out on the floor - neither of them minding the dirt that was rubbing all over their clothes and bodies. "I hate you!" The girl cried, tugging at his blue locks as the thin male did the same to her tied up hair, one of her pigtails out and the other still messily in. "You're no match for me, puny peasant!" He grinned at her, finding in amusement in her cries and shouts as she threw her tiny fists at him.

A black-haired boy sitting near them, he buried his head further in his book, golden eyes glimmering at the shapes and words on the printed pages. "It's...It's so symmetrical!" He said, grinning as he completely ignored the two to his right - completely immersed in his book. Flipping to the next page with an excited look before a distraught one replaced it, the male slamming his book down against the ground, his two friends immediately stopping their fist fight in confusion. "This page is... garbage!" He shouted loudly, stomping the book into the ground as the other two children quickly sat up. The pig tailed girl standing up, brushing the dirt from her tattered pink dress, and rushing over to her friend and patting his head in a comforting fashion her mother had often done with her.

"It's okay, Kid!" She smiled softly, hugging her friend as he stopped his stomping, looking over at the pig tailed girl with a questioning look. "You can't stomp on it because it's from the library, and it's not yours! So if you don't like it, we can just return it." She nodded, picking up the book and dusting it off slightly, before sending another warm smile to her friend - the blue haired boy on the ground now gone and out of sight.

Sniffing, the black-haired boy merely nodded, the blonde taking his head as she began to lead him towards the library - a happy smile twisting at her lips, that is, until the blue haired boy appeared out of no where, tackling them to the ground. "Yahoo! Bow down to your God, puny Humans!" he screamed loudly, his orange basketball jersey tattered and dirty from their little wrestling match earlier. "Black*Star! I'm going to kill you, you stupid monkey!" The pig tailed girl cried, their fighting continuing.

Things got no better from then on, the two would always bicker and fight - with the black haired boy at their side, a trio of misfits in their large kindergarten class. Years passing, the pig tailed girl never lost her hair style, many parts of her never changing, her chest being one of those things.

"Flat chest! Maka has a flat chest!" Black*Star grinned, pointing and laughing at his friend as she smacked him with one of her books. "S-shut up, you monkey!" she said angrily, Kid simply nodding in agreement behind her. "You do have a flat chest, Maka. But you are so much more symmetrical because of it, I mean - just look at you; the image of beauty!" he said in a matter-of-fact tone, the thirteen year old girl's face turning beet red at his comment. "W-what are you talking about!?" She muttered, smacking Kid with her book as well - yet not as hard as she had just done to the blue haired boy, who was now laying on the floor with blood spewing out of his head.

"What!? Do you like Kid, Maka!?" He shot up, hands balled into fists as he looked incredulously between the two of them. "N-no!" She cried, Kid standing there obliviously as she began to get worked up, cheeks still a bright red as she looked over at one of her best friends. "I think you do. It's a good thing too, seeing as I would never like a flat chested girl like you!" he nodded triumphantly, the pig tailed girl merely groaning and slamming her book down onto his head again. Maka was sure she would never like her friend, not in a million life times! But as they got older, things began to change.

Now at the age of fifteen, Maka was experiencing things she'd rather not. Now moving on to crush on her blue haired friend, she never seemed to get much of a response from him - the slightly shorter teen always chasing after the older and more _curvy_ girls. But she supposed it wasn't all bad. After all, that was how she had met Tsubaki; a sweet girl who Black*Star had befriended and named his goddess, which Maka guessed was because of her beautiful body and tolerating personality.

She wanted to hate her so much, wanted to tell her off for being close to her best friend and for letting him have these feelings for her, but she couldn't. Tsubaki was just too kind, and Maka felt herself giving in. Tsubaki was just such a good person, and Maka could see how perfect they were for each other, no matter how much she didn't want to admit it. She had always been the mature one in their small trio of friends, and she supposed that now was as good a time as any to be that mature, smart girl her parents had raised her to be.

But that maturity began to slip away the following months, when her parents divorced. Hiding their problems from her, Maka had always known that something was wrong. Her father would stay out late, her mother would stay up angrily - there would be shouting in the midst of the night, the neighbor's dog barking, their newborn baby wailing at the sound of an angry and guilty father screaming shamelessly at one another. Her father had never been committed to her mother, even when she was young she was often left to wait on the side of the street while he 'ran into the store' or went off to 'have a quick smoke'. Those lasting hours had what had partly sparked the angry look in her mother's emerald eyes, and Maka couldn't help but feel a bit guilty about it.

As a result of the divorce, Maka had taken an immediate hatred towards her father for giving up their marriage so easily, her mother taking off in the middle of the night after the files had been made - leaving to travel the world on her own without saying good-bye to her now ex-husband and desperate daughter.

Spending the next few days at home, Maka refused to leave her room - her father's cries and pleas for her to leave and eat something never reaching her ears as she lie helplessly on her bed, staring up at the ceiling as she wondered where everything had gone wrong. How had her mother forgotten about her? She wanted to get away from that foul red haired man too, didn't she!? Feeling utterly defeated, the blond-haired girl buried her face deeper into the pillow, muffling her sobs as she cried her heart out. Words could not express how alone she felt. And then she heard it, the sound of her window opening.

Someone climbing in, Maka lay frozen on her bed, knowing exactly who it was and decided she'd rather not face him. "Go away..." she mumbled quietly, tears filling her emerald orbs again as she lay there, the soft impression of someone sitting next to her on her bed making her tense up. "Did you hear me!? I said leave me alo-" she began, freezing as she saw his soft expression, even if it was there for only a moment. Face quickly contorting back to his usual look of obliviousness, Kid furrowed his eyebrows slightly as he looked down at her. "Where have you been, Maka? You've missed a lot at school. Black*Star finally confessed to Tsubaki, and they've even started dating. Tsubaki's been so worried about you, and Black*Star as well." He said, Maka merely puffing out her cheeks slightly in annoyance and turning her head away.

"Maka!" He said, trying to get her attention as his lips pulled down into a frown. "Go away, Kid. I don't want you here." She mumbled, hugging her pillow a bit tighter as she did her best to hold herself together until Kid would leave - which she presumed would be never, seeing as he wasn't budging even a little bit. "...Maka, I know what happened with your parents. Your father has been blubbering it to mine for the past week - he's talking about how you never your room to eat or do anything else..." He trailed off, sighing softly as he reached out a hand to gently stroke her hair in a comforting fashion - appearing much more mature in this moment than he had ever been as the symmetry OCD kid at the front of the class.

Finally moving out of her position on the bed, tears began to fill her eyes, Kid's golden ones widening slightly at the sight of the headstrong Maka look so vulnerable. Pulling her into a hug, Maka hugged his chest silently, the only sounds heard were her sobs as she cried into his shirt - the male, for once, not caring about the unsymmetrical way her tears were falling. Softly stroking her hair, Kid sat with her for as long as it took until she began to calm down, the petite girl looking up at her friend as she wiped away her tears.

"S-sorry. I got your shirt all wet." she muttered, blinking in a confused manner as she looked at her friend. "O-oi... what's wrong with you?" she asked, furrowing her eyebrows as her emerald orbs met with his gold ones, her heart awkwardly increasing it's pace as his face seemed to inch closer and closer to hers until he stopped inches away, her face now as red as a tomato as she looked at him. "You have something on your face," he said, wiping off the mysterious substance and moving away again - the teenage girl now feeling more frustrated than over. "Kid, you idiot!" she cried, throwing a pillow at the unsuspecting teen before grabbing his collar and pressing her lips against his forcefully. Both melting into the other after a moment, both pairs of eyes shut closed, the two now embracing as their lips moved together for a moment, and then they pulled away. "A-ah.. sorry, I don't know what came over m-" she began, being silenced as Kid pressed his lips to hers again for a short moment.

After that, the two became inseparable beginning to date and become a couple - the new both new to this type of relationship, but still excited and happy none the less. And eventually, things began to escalate to new levels, and soon after Graduation night came.

Smoothing out her dress, Maka looked up at her father, huffing slightly at his blubbering face. "Papa, stop crying. Kid and I are just going out to a party for a few hours and then we'll be right back, safe and sound. Geez, you'd think I was still eight years old - not eighteen." She sighed, rolling her eyes as her father began to cry harder, blubbering some incomprehensible words that sounded amongst the lines of '_already eighteen_', '_she look's so much like her'_, and '_my baby's so grown up_'. The doorbell ringing, Maka bound over to the door excitedly, hugging her boyfriend as she saw him - the dark-haired male smiling happily at her response.

"You look fantastic, Maka. Perfectly symmetrical." He nodded, giving her the thumbs up as she blushed slightly and thanked him, giving him a small kiss on the cheek before turning her head to look over her shoulder at her father. "Later Papa!" She said, giving him a small wave before pulling Kid out the front door with her, shutting the door behind her as she grinned up at him. "I can't believe we've already graduated." She smiled, hand entwined with Kid's as they walked towards his car - an expensive brand due to his father being the Principal of their high-end High School.

Kid opening the door for her, Maka mumbled a small thank you, getting into the passenger seat as Kid closed the door and moved to the driver's side, climbing into the expensive car and starting the engine. Not moving out of the drive way, Maka gave her boyfriend a questioning look, only to recoil slightly in shock as he pulled something out of his pocket. She was terrified of this day, and perhaps she should of told him that - told him of afraid she was of getting married, of ending up like her parents but it was too late for that now, in her eyes.

"Maka, I love you so much, and I can't imagine being with anyone else... please... will you marry me?" He asked, opening the little black box, a beautiful princess cut diamond ring waiting inside for her. Hands cupping her mouth, Maka looked up into his eyes, searching for any sort of trace of her father inside of the beautiful golden orbs. Finally coming to a decision, she managed to nod, Kid smiling happily at her and moving to place the expensive ring on her ring finger.

"Kid...I..." she began, cut off by Kid's knowing smile. "Don't worry, Maka. I'll always be faithful to you, I promise." he smiled comfortingly, the female simply nodding and moving forward to hug him, crushing their lips together in a heated kiss. They were getting married... they were getting married! "I know it's a bit old-fashioned, but I was going to ask you a while ago - but I wanted to get your father's permission first, and he finally agreed." He said, rubbing the back of his neck as he moved to pull out of the drive way, Maka nodding understandably. "So that's why he was being a bigger cry baby than usual," she said aloud, a smile etching its way onto her lips despite the slight uncomfortableness settling within her. Was she ready for this? This whole... marriage thing? They were still so young, still had so much of their lives to live out. Was this really what they both wanted? Maka wasn't sure, but these thoughts were soon forgotten as they arrived at their graduating after party, Black*Star and Tsubaki already there.

Tsubaki seeing the ring first, she gasped, Black*Star quickly catching on. Throughout the previous few years, he had morphed into the big brother type for Maka, always protecting her whenever she was upset and couldn't turn to Kid or Tsubaki, and Tsubaki and her had gotten even closer - Tsubaki becoming her first 'girl' friend ever. "Kid did...did you...?" Tsubaki gaped, Maka simply nodding as the curvy girl simply giggled and hugged her friend, Black*Star suddenly glaring dangerously at Kid. "Oi! Kid! I know we've known each together since forever, but if you break Maka's heart I'm gonna break you!" he said i a threatening manner, Kid not at all phased by it as he simply chuckled and nodded. Entering the party, the foursome quickly lost themselves in the music, alcohol and fun. Kid and Maka, who had never truly been party people, had the times of their lives, until two hours later - when Kid moved to drive them home.

The two entering the car, they were too far gone to realize how drunk they were, incapable of driving as well as they thought they could. Driving on the wrong side of the road, it was only moments before it hit them - the large cargo truck. The impact so powerful, Maka could only feel pain and darkness as the sound of sirens and screams engulfed the world, finally dimming bit by bit until there was nothing but silence.


	2. Chapter 2: First Loss

**Last Time: **Maka had her first day of kindergarten, and met Black*Star and Kid. Her parents divorce, and Kid and Maka's relationship begins to blossom as the two start dating. Kid later proposes on the night of their graduation, to which Maka hesitantly accepts. The two then head out to the after party, get wasted and try to drive home - only to drive on the wrong side of the road and collide into a cargo truck.

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**First**

Chapter Two: _First Loss_

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Maka's world was on silence, darkness consuming her as few small sounds could be heard. A shuffle here, a muffled cry there, the faint beeping of a heart monitor as the green line danced across the square screen. Where was she? What had happened? The only thing she could remember was the party; yelling groups of teens and large crowds of people dancing together in a mob of sweat and raging hormones, Kid's hand on the small of her back as he guided her out of the house - the smell of alcohol so prominent in the air around them, it made her intoxicated by it just by thinking back to those moments. And then, darkness; darkness and pain, a sharp ringing in her ears along with the sounds of screams and sirens, slowly fading until there was nothing but silence hanging in the world around her - as if time itself had stopped for her.

Moving slightly, she slowly become more accustomed to her surroundings, the female lying on a cot of some sort, the sound of beeping slightly louder than before. Was she at home? She supposed that was a logical solution, but then why was it so hard to open her eyes? And what was with her body feeling so sore and limp, and come to think of it - what the hell was that beeping noise!? A small groan pushing past her lips, she shifted, trying to move more despite the prominent soreness that rang throughout her body. It was then a voice was heard to her side.

"M...aka? A-are you awake?" A soft voice, no doubt Tsubaki's, asked. Maka getting somewhat confused by why Tsubaki was in hr room, she forced her crusty eyes to open, blinking as she adjusted herself to the bright white walls and light of the room. This was definitely not her bedroom. "W...where am I?"she managed to say, her voice strained and throat dry. Boy, what she'd do for a cup of water.

Green eyes finally adjusted to the light of the room, they remained half-open - more drowsy and tired than she would have liked to admit. Orbs flickering over to Tsubaki, she did a double take as she realized that the beautiful black-haired girl was crying; her dark blue eyes rimmed red from the liquids that were trailing down her face. "W-why are you crying!? Did Black*Star do something to you again?" she asked, reaching out one of her thin hands to take Tsubaki's, her joints protesting as the sore feeling spread throughout her out reaching limb. Then seeing the IV hooked up to her vein and the bandages that wrapped all the way up her right arm, Maka blinked - unsure what to think of them. "W-what?" she mumbled quietly, diverting her hand up to her head to feel the thick bandages that wrapped around her forehead.

Tsubaki seemed to cry harder at Maka's slow realization, the memories finally flowing back into her mind. They had been so drunk, so drunk she could barely think at the time. And yet, they had gotten into Kid's car to leave unnoticed by their friends or the rest of the part, they had driven on the wrong side of the road and had hit that cargo truck...! Wait a minute, where was Kid then!? Maka's emerald eyes widening, she turned her head to Tsubaki, looking for some sort of explanation. "Where is he!? Where's Kid!?" She demanded, voice rising as she lost all other thoughts; her mind focused directly on the black-haired male who had made her days so much brighter ever since she had first met him. Tsubaki left out a stifled sob, covering her mouth with one of her hands as she managed to mutter out a few words. "He's... dead... he's dead, Maka... I'm so sorry! There was nothing they could do, he was far gone by the time the ambulances had gotten there! They think he leaned over you to protect you when the main impact happened!" She sobbed harder, Maka's world suddenly coming to a halt. Kid was dead?

Her heart has shattered into a million pieces, no one there to pick up the pieces as Maka sat there shell-shocked on the bed, Tsubaki sitting next to her as the curvy teen cried, sobs racking through her body as she covered her face further - crying desperately into her hands for the loss of her close friend, for the lose of Maka's long time boyfriend and new fiancé. Words could not explain how desperate Maka suddenly felt, the reality of situation feeling so terrifying that she could scream. If this was a dream, it felt real enough to make her sick, real enough to make her want to burst out crying right then and there, but she couldn't - she was too terrified, too shocked to even think properly, her vision blurring and shaking as though she was on the inside of a washing machine. Her fiancé was dead. Dead.

The words replayed themselves over and over again in her mind, like a broken record set on repeat to torture its owner. Dead. Dead. Dead. He was dead, gone from the world. She'd never get to see his handsome, kind face again, never get to hold him in her arms and kiss him with all she had. They were going to get married, going to go to Harvard together and live out their lives; buy a house, have kids, set those kids up with Tsubaki's and Black*Star's, and watch the whole process repeat as they lived out every single day as they had intended it to; peacefully. Kid would take over his father's place as the Principal of the local High School and University and Maka would become a successful lawyer who saved people in dire need of justice on their part. And they would've been perfectly content with their lives until the day they died, wouldn't they?

But that wasn't possible now, Kid was gone from this world, all possibilities of Maka living out a normal life with a normal husband and children gone from her mind. How was she supposed to live on without him? He had been her rock since childhood, the one who never changed and was always there for her to lean on, and vice versa. Life just wouldn't work without him in the equation!

That was right, this all couldn't be possible. Tsubaki had to be lying, this had to be a joke of some sort - a cruel joke that everyone was playing on her! That had to be it, right? She hadn't realized she was crying until the tears fell onto her lap, the female now sitting straight up as she looked down at her trembling hands. It wasn't a lie. Tsubaki would never lie to her about something like this, heck - Tsubaki wouldn't lie to her ever.

The door opening, it was then a loud shout was heard, somebody crushing her body in a tight hug. "Yahoo! Maka's awake!" He said happily, Maka's tears only overflowing further as a sob racked through her body - the bluenette freezing slightly as Maka slowly wrapped her arms around him and cried into his chest, the big brother in Black*Star shining through in that moment as he seemed to mature by a decade in a matter of seconds. Softly stroking her hair, he mumbled quiet comforting words to her - then realizing how awful his words had been before, even though he had meant well. "Sh... it's okay." He mumbled softly, Tsubaki simply rubbing Maka's back as she cried her heart out. Kid was dead, he was dead; gone off the face of the Earth, never to be seen again.

Yet in all of her grief, a sense of relief hit her. She wouldn't have to get married now, wouldn't have to force herself to make Kid happy or tell herself that this was the right thing - that she wanted all of this. Despising the fact that was she was somewhat glad by this fact, Maka slowed her tears, beginning to calm down as she hesitantly let go on her friends. "T-thanks..." she muttered, wiping away her tears with her hands as the sound of the door opening again caused her to perk up slightly.

"I see you're awake." A deep, male's voice said - the silver-haired man holding a clipboard as he walked into the room, her father sobbing behind her as he launched himself at her. "Maka! My precious Maka! I was so worried I'd lose you!" He cried, rubbing his face lovingly against hers as he sobbed, Maka desperately trying to push him away. "M...Maka chop!" she shouted, slamming a book she had produced out of no where against the male's head. "Well that confirms you know who we all are... tell me Miss Albarn, how are you feeling?" The Doctor asked, for some reason on a rolling chair as he rolled over to the side of her bed, still holding his clip board as a cigarette hung out of the side of his mouth. Was he even allowed to be smoking that while inside the hospital?

"I'm fine..." she said, hesitantly looking her own body over as she thought about it further. Aside from the tight feeling in her chest, everything was fine with her physically. Mentally, on the other hand... well, she'd rather not think about that any further. "I see," The Doctor nodded, again, looking up at her with his sharp eyes. "I'm Doctor Franken Stein, but most people call me Stein. I went to school with your father." He said. writing something else on his clip board a his eyes flashed behind his glasses, Maka simply nodding in response. "You should be fine to go in the next few days. The police have already concluded that this was an accident, so there is no need for any further investigation or interrogating on your part." He said, before turning to her two friends and father. "I'm going to perform a check up to make sure everything is alright, so you're going to need to leave for a moment." he said, the group nodding and her father, regrettably, hugging her one last time before being dragged out of the room by Black*Star.

After everything had been checked out and her condition stabilized, Maka was finally free to go home - leaving with her father to head back to their small house, Maka immediately heading to her room and locking the door behind her, curling up into a ball on her bed with one of Kid's sweat shirts she had borrowed, hugging it close to her chest as she simply lie there.

There was no use in crying, she concluded. There was no bringing him back, and besides - if she cried, she'd end up being 'unsymmetrical', wouldn't she? The feeling brought a small smile to her face, her chest and stomach turning in turmoil as her thoughts became consumed by the black-haired male. "I miss you, it hasn't even been that long and I miss you." She whispered silently to herself, emerald orbs filling with tears as she shook her head and wiped them away.

A few days later and she was still in the same condition. Knowing she had things to do before her departure for Harvard University, Maka eventually dragged herself out of bed - packing her things for the University she had planned on attending Kid with, but was now attending alone. She couldn't back out now, although. After all, she had already accepted the scholarship, had already been there for the tour with Kid - had already heard about how great he thought it was for the two of them, how symmetrical it was. They had even picked out an on campus apartment for them to rent out together, one that they had already put the down payment on. Which meant that she was going to have to live in that apartment alone.

The idea putting a small frown on her face, Maka closed her eyes for a moment, doing her best to calm herself, the pain in her chest never-ceasing to appear whenever she thought about her now dead fiancé. She wasn't going to be able to keep doing this without him, not like this. And yet, she had to.

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**Author's Note: **From now on, replies to comments, updates, author notes and other things will be kept at the bottom of the chapter, after each and every chapter is written. Above the chapter will be a brief recap of what happened in the previous chapter, for when I am away for a short while - so you will not have to read up to that point again to become acquainted with the story again. Chapters will always be two thousand words or more and will be updated weekly, if not every two to three days. Please understand that I have a life as well, and will not always be able to deliver. Thank you for the first review(s), and I will post replies to them at the end of every chapter, including this one.

**Next Chapter: **Maka, now twenty-one, is still hung over her dead fiancé, and meets the infuriating Soul Eater Evans after transferring to her local community University; where Tsubaki and Black*Star have been attending for the past three years. Moving into the dorms, she struggles after finding out she has to share an Apartment with the white-haired demon who has tormented her none stop since her arrival.

**Replies: **

_Cocaine Heart - _Words can not express how much your comment made me squeal like a fan girl who had just watched her one true pair finally hook up. Thank you so much for your review! I was so worried no one would like it, and yet - I've already gotten a review on it. I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and will continue to read!


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